Tiger Woods' prepared statement read in front of a group of 'friends' was in short, interesting. Tiger invoking Buddhism made Richard Gere poop the gerbil out of his ass for sure, but who am I to judge? I am an anonymous blogger, that is who, bitch. If he was really sorry and had perspective on the whole situation he would understand why the media had such a throbbing boner for stories about his... throbbing, drug-strengthened boner. He denied steroids and that Elin beat him up- whatever, I hate golf.
Here are some reactions I saw on twitter, a twurvey, if you will? You will not? Fine.
@twoeightnine Funny, my core values actually include banging everything in sight.
@BorowitzReport First impression: that third Ambien this morning was a mistake.
@ProFootballtalk At some point, Tiger drifted from buddhism to "booty-ism." (Icouldn't resist.)
@offendthis Tiger invoking Buddhism made Richard Gere poop the gerbil out of his ass. Last Tiger tweet.
Elin is still hot, though, so there is that.
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