Friday, March 26, 2010

Somebody Get This Man A Cheeseburger

The latest Youtube sensation involves a drunk man longing for a cheeseburger and the tangled web he weaves as he tries to fight a guy at a Whataburger in Texas with special guest appearance by noted white rapper Paul Wall (don't care) and other people I think have something to do with music about which I do not care. Have you ever been drunk to the point where you could not fight? I don't think I have except maybe that one night where I drank loads of Soju and beer as I shouted "No tomorrow!" with a bunch of Korean guys. I threw up kim chi 4 times the next morning. It turns out there was a tomorrow.
You have a chance to get in on the ground floor here, folks. The video was posted 3/25/2010. There is brief, non-sexual nudity of the 2nd worst kind, a guy's butt. Enjoy and be the first to share it with your friends. Tell them where you heard it first. Y'all come back now, ya hear? Ok, I'm going to stop now and show the video.

My favorite parts of the video are the guy in the brown shirt repeatedly asking the drunk guy who attacked him, "are you done" after he had the guy in the worst submission hold ever *looks to MMA aficionados for confirmation* and the guys of unknown ethnicity at the 3:00 mark who say, "Only in America." Only in America, indeed, my culturally diverse brethren. And then at the end we see Paul Wall put Michael Strahan on blast for being slow. Not a smart move, Gap Tooth will be looking for you in the screets! You won't be able to lay low at the scrip club or Scranton, PA. Wait, that one works without changing the... oh, nevermind. I ASKED FOR A CHEESEBURGER! I'LL WHOOP ALL Y'ALL! I WILL BEAT YOU ALL OVER THOSE FRENCH FRIES!


  1. If this guy would have read "fast food nation," he would likely have not been so disappointed in the lack of cheeseburger that fateful day. Then again he is fairly fat and stupid, so he probably can't retain information anyway.

    Good stuff!